How to find a mentor virtually.

Most of us have been told that having a mentor can profoundly change our lives. I'd agree with this statement if the mentor takes the time to give and add value to your experience, and you come prepared for growth and learning.

Since we are living in a virtual world, networking, and connecting is at an all-time high across our Nation and others. I wanted to give a few highlights on how to best start a mentorship and what to look out for to make it work for both of you. Clarity is often the best way to move forward.

There are two roadblocks we often find when trying to gain entrance with a potential Mentor and moving the mentorship along its path.

1.  Finding the right fit and getting them to agree to mentor you
2. Being specific with your new Mentor on what you most need from them

So let's take a moment and define these things:

 Finding the right fit.

Who would you like most to learn from and WHY? A leader comes in all shapes, sizes, and personalities. Looking through your network and LinkedIn is a good way to start your search. But are you just searching for someone who lives in the same city, someone who does what you think you want to do, or someone who is highly valued in their industry? What are your parameters? Your needs?

 Here are a few quick steps to understanding your needs.

1. What is your immediate goal in your life/career that a mentor could support through knowledge share?
2. How do you best learn and absorb information?
3. What are you looking to do with the knowledge you will learn?
4. What is your timeframe?

#1 What are your immediate goals? This will help you define what you MOST need from the mentorship. If you start here, you will quickly find that not everyone will have the experience, time, or skillset to fit your goals.

#2 What type of learner are you? This will give you the language to use with a potential mentor. Can they meet your learning requirement? Will they be available to screen share with you as visual learning is how you best absorb info? Will they be available via phone to have conversations? Are you expecting some notes or exercises after each call? You need to know how you best learn and your expectations so you can ask if that works for your Mentor before beginning the process.

#3 How will you apply the knowledge: Defining this will help you lead your Mentor toward the goal line! What is the outcome of the mentorship you envision? If you don't know, it will be unclear to your Mentor if your needs are being met, or if they are providing the right information to meet your goals. You want to be clear on how you will apply the learning, so you can provide proper feedback and ask relevant questions of your Mentor. Giving up-front expectations can be an amazing asset for both of you as you progress with a concrete outcome in mind.

As an example: "I need an internship for the winter semester and would like to understand the best positions that would fit my skills and passions. I feel lost and don't understand my value or the best course of action."

 #1 Answer:

Need to have a better idea of my skillset and what will be the best roles to apply to.

#2 Answer:

I am a visual learner, I would like to be able to have video calls or written exercises to help me learn.

#3 Answer:

I am going to take the knowledge from my Mentor and use it to apply to the 'right' roles for a winter internship.

#4 Answer:

I'd like to have a call every two weeks over the next two months.

 Now you can start your search.

 There are opportunities through companies like The Mom Project such as Rally, Facebook Mentoring Groups, and other professional sites such as LinkedIn that let members designate their interests in Mentoring. When approaching a mentor make sure to provide them with each answer to questions 1 through 4. This will immediately help them understand your goals and how you would like to approach the relationship.

Know your ask! Everyone will want to know why you are looking for a mentor and then secondly, what you are looking for in a mentor. How do you decide WHO will be a good mentor for you?

 Here are quick steps to understanding WHO may be a good fit for you.

1. Experience: Look for someone who may have had a similar experience or background, that could tell you detailed accounts of how they navigated through transition and growth opportunities. It could be someone who is from a different industry that could challenge your reasoning and thought process due to who they work with, not necessarily their experiences doing their work. What might be most valuable for you?
2. Time: Will they have time to invest in you consistently? Will they be able to give undivided attention to growing the mentorship? Are you looking for a quick weekly engagement for one month (weekly calls)? Are you looking for a 3-month commitment and monthly calls and quick touch-base or emails in between? Understand your timeline so you can understand the time investment that will be needed and if they can provide that.
3. Personality: Does this person jive with you? Will you be able to ask questions and feel comfortable walking through the vulnerable details of your life and choices? This is incredibly important to make the most of your mentorship!

Don’t forget that there are additional opportunities to ask for mentorship at work. However, consider in this scenario that there is a ton of trust that comes with sharing personal anecdotes, your background, and your challenges, that need to be taken into account as you are in a working relationship with this person. 

Here’s to finding your fit and making progress in your career, supported by those who are invested in your growth!

Your Growth Advocate, Briar