Two Steps to Leadership

It's ironic that during the hardest times to lead is when leadership matters the most. For many of us, we tend to fall back to predictable, comfortable patterns of leading. Those patterns tend not to serve us or those we lead well. Whether it's leading a classroom, a family, a Fortune 500 company or a country, the following two steps are essential:

1. Self Definition- One reason people get anxious is an unpredictable leader. When anxiety rises, many leaders either listen to the loudest voice or begin micromanaging others. Both of these behaviors make the leader temporarily calmer but everyone else worse off. Instead, it's important for leaders to develop guiding principles for their particular role. Guiding Principles, which can be "borrowed" from reading, experience or others, are then "tried on" to see their fit for the leader and the group. They can be discarded or altered bases on new information or experience, not the most vocal person or group.
2. Self Regulation- Once a leader develops their principles (perhaps a first draft), they communicate their thinking to others. Invariably these principles will be resisted by some. When resistance kicks in, many leaders respond by pulling back from those most resistant or resort to direct confrontation. Neither are effective and the leader ends up the most stressed of anyone. The ability to stay connected to all team members while consistently living out those principles is the key to a leader's own emotional health- thus becoming a less anxious presence among those they lead.

Self definition and self regulation are two indispensable keys to effective leadership. However, this is no magic formula. All humans are rational free agents. Yet by defining yourself and regulating your own emotions, you increase your chance for effective leadership.